Exciting!

 I've been observing a little ritual for 5 nights and I am pretty happy with the visable results. I finally got serious about the sleep lines on my face, particularly the left side as I am, for the most part, a left side sleeper.

 An interesting aside: In Paris 1989, my husband and I lucked into staying in a real parisian apartment for 2 nights. The femme of the household - an old friend of my sister in law's -and I had a discussion about furrowing our faces into our pillows and whether or not we'd regret it.  For some reason we had determined that we both slept on our stomachs! She was skeptical but I remember thinking at the time that I should definitely change this bad habit. Fast forward to 2025 and I'm finally getting around to it. When you are pregnant you are advised to sleep on your left side, better for the both of you I guess! - and I got into that habit.

My one and a half years younger sister does not have the facial vertical lines that I have. She sleeps on her back and always has.

So, I put a pillow under my knees, silicone patches on my face and committed to sleeping sunny side up! Today I am blown away by the progress I've had in eradicating these sleep induced wrinkles/lines. I think the silicone patches (reusable) are very important - one line was only half covered last night and I can SEE the different in either side of the rivulet in my skin. It's incroyable!

Additionally when I sauna (in home, what a luxury) I gua sha and then microcurrent my face. This time of year I am taking a sauna 3 times a week so this is a consistant treatment. This week I've done this part of the ritual twice. 

xo

LESSON THREE

 So we're using the stars in our eyes to block out the negative, to shine on the positive. In other words we're creating out own reality. This I highly suggest because reality is so subjective - why not make it fabulous. 

Right now I'm trying to break a bad habit and it's easier to frame it with the positives that will result rather than with the negatives/difficulty of breaking it.  Made up a story that reinforces my positives. 

I have severe sleep related lines on my face - I sleep like the proverbial baby, thank heavens! - but I am a side sleeper and squishing my face into the pillow every night has proven to be very aging to my skin. I have vertical lines - wrinkles - to show for this bad habit. So I am, once again, vowing to sleep on my back. I've done 3 nights in a row and am very proud of myself as I've tried this before and always failed miserably.  My goal is to make it a month and then I'll look into filler - which I've never done, but could work if I can stay off my face while sleeping. I'd also like to refresh my microbladed brows and will do this for myself IF I can retrain my sleeping habit. 

xo

Living

 I'd like to write more and I intend to, we'll see tho because I'm starting a novel (!) - exciting I know! - and perhaps I'll be too busy with that. I intend to watch less youtube (my only social media guilty pleasure) so that should open up some scribbling time. May I remind how much I abhor facebook?

My Chicago agency would like new photos for their website and it's been 2 1/2 years since the last round, so I guess I'll start that process. I've been wearing my hair a bit shorter as well and my last round of photos were a disappointment.  I really only liked one outfit series and my hair was just too long. Oh well. It was disappointing because I haven't booked much since taking them! So I do need new ones. In preparation I'll step up my exercise/toning routine - my waist feels big!! and gather some outfits for the shoot. It feels good to have a goal - glow up a bit!  Additionally, now that I've decided to stop appraising as my 'day job' I have the wherewithal/more time l to travel for modeling gigs. 

I know, this should be Lesson 3, but that'll come eventually.....

Today I'm going to pull out the nasturiums and random cherry tomato plants that are still in ground - in late November! And generally clean up the garden.

Late lunch at La Ville Lumiere to catch up with an old friend later......

xo

lesson two

 what to shine the stars in your eyes upon? there actually are very few choices when looking at the big picture: health, family, friends, purpose. can you name anything else? i can't.  lmk in the comments. 

ah health. we find it very difficult to be healthy. so much bad food that tastes good. alcohol. legal pot. endless scrolling of bad content, movies and tv on demand.... our consumer culture made "ease" the vey best thing ever! Open a box, add water , zap it and dinner! Buzz up to the Target for a Target run. If you had to walk there you'd think twice about that. eat a healthy diet? no thanks, tie up my stomach or give me a pill - why should I have to do anything, that's so hard! 

so what if you shine the stars on your health. will you see it  now? will you see it differently? will the light give it extra importance, strength, power (that word again)? shrugs.

my lifestyle shhhhh lesson one

 many of you have inquired as to my lifestyle. you want more, perhaps, than I reveal in these pages. but in these pages I reveal alot if you know what you are looking for. in general I'm not a fan of sharing. mystery holds power. but I'm bored and not captalizing the beginning words of sentences - also losing luster. 

my fabulous life. all the little daily pleasures. candies for the hours. first you have to place stars in your eyes. i'm not kidding, it's number one for a reason. a foundation for what's to come. attitude. everyone's star is different because everyone is different. what the stars in your eyes shield you from is powerful. you need a shield sometimes because part of life is acknowledging your basic helplessness in so much of it. there will be things you see, hear, feel, smell, taste, intuit and know that you shrink from, that you hate, that you wish you never saw. use your stars to blithly shine them out. accept that they are there and forget them. awareness and acceptance.

say it again: awareness, acceptance, attitude. remember those, in the powerful weapon category

i would suggest an attitude of gratitude but you find your angle. remember positivity is powerful.

Pperhaps I'll break right now and think about how much I'm going to present here. i don't want a fucking to to list of course but the logical next step is what are the things you want the stars in your eyes to shine on, to illuminate for you. 

Coquette

  There is a trend - if you google coquette - that is not what I'm referring to here. Flirtatious, romantic, cunning, slyly using feminine wiles to persuade...... not bad things I guess, but, again, I'm not on the social media trend train andthis isn't my thing. 

I'm referring to a woman who engages in self care. Daily, weekly, always! A very French Secret! The coquette woman. Indulges in skin care, manicures, haircare as a way of life. What a delicious secret.

So here's my Tuesday ritual a la coquette.

Some lovely stretching, a hot sauna and some cold rinses, a gorgeous shower exfoliating etc. Enjoying the application of super luscious lotion afterward and drying my hair with my latest (big) indulgence my dyson. I love how my hair looks so it's worth it. And then it's time to prepare for my ballet class, some stretches of my feet and legs as I dress for it. I love my weekly ballet class, it's imperative for my posture at this point!

No guilt! That is imperative as well!!

xo

what now for me

 well today I've felt a weird internal individual energy. one that wants to be independent of the external, different from usual

not one seeking anying any mantle or grace from any corner but one that is mine.

it is notable that a surge of personal power has emerged on this dark day

a primal backlash 

Sweet Designs Chocolate Ha ha ha

 2 years since I've written!! What compels such action? Sea parted? Writer's block, cleared? An omg feeling that I need the accountability of dates otherwise I lose them? So baby I'm back.

With a tres moi reason. I'd like to rant about Sweet Designs being closed Jan 1 -10 which is just absurd. Where am I to go. What am I to do? There is no answer. 

So I went to Heinens. Handy and I needed whipped cream (remind me about my apple crisp:old school recipe) .After walking around their "bakery", deciding that a yummy coffee cake sounded like it would do but of course finding nothing!! and feeling like a weirdo cause I ended up looking at everything and I'm sure the look on my face was nice. But I did find, tucked in the brownie case, a very tasty brownie/caramel/cookie dough layered bar. And I ate it with tea, quite hit the spot.

BUT back to the dearth of good chocolate and the need for everyone to stock up! Now there is a thing called damp January and if you're doing any of those alcohol things you can probably do it but you'll need tea and good sweets. Everyday I think of driving over the bridge to Lakewood and it's a few days yet till Sweet Designs (a most european thing in my neighborhood) reopens. Try the nut patty. Either cashew, pecan or almond, dark or milk chocolate, caramel. It's all you need really because right there all you math majors can tell me how many variations you can indulge in. Six, I think. Ok the toffee and brittle are smashing as well.